This Person Gave Guy A Handjob At An NFL Game While Boyfriend Was Gone

Depending on your point of view, the missed connections section of Craigslist is either one of the most depressing or consistently entertaining places on the Internet. I personally fall into the second camp.

I can understand why some of these posts could make you sad if they were earnestly written by real people, and that's why I tell myself every single listing is actually a fabrication written by a selfless person with a fantastic sense of humor who wants to provide the planet with free entertainment.

That might not be the case with every post, but it probably is with one allegedly written by a 19-year-old who engaged in some hand stuff with a random fan in the stands of a Buffalo Bills game when the poster's boyfriend went to grab food.

The post reads,

I sat down next to you today at the game. I was with my boyfriend. When he went to get food and drinks, you put your hand on my leg. At first I was weirded out, but that quickly passed. Instead of moving your hand, I let you touch my leg. Idk why... I never did anything like this before, especially cause I have a bf, but I slid my hand down your pants. I was too nervous to make eye contact with you tho, so I don't really know what you look like. You didn't move my hand or freak out, so I grabbed your dick and gave u a hand job until u creamed in your pants. As soon as I felt your cream explode all over my hand, my boyfriend came back and sat down. I was so nervous cause I had to act like nothing [happened]. I didn't see your face cause I was looking down the whole time. Besides you had that face paint on your face that was kinda cute. I'd kinda like to give you another hand job, but I gotta make sure it's really you. So if you see this, tell me what color paint you wore, and if you wore any underwear to prove it is you.

I'm assuming the face paint had to be red and blue, so you really have a 50/50 chance in guessing the underwear situation. Oh, did I mention the ad was still up as of this publication?

Citations: Craigslist Missed Connection At Bills Game – “I Gave You A Handjob While My Boyfriend Was Getting Us Beers” (Barstool Sports)