How To Make Having Rizz Your Whole Personality (When You Have None)

The 2023 Oxford word of the year is “rizz,” aka “style, charm, or attractiveness; the ability to attract a romantic or sexual partner.” It’s thought to be short for “charisma,” a word that arguably doesn’t need to be shortened, as it’s only three syllables. (Why don’t they shorten “breakfast burrito”? It would take 30 minutes off my week.) However, having rizz is critical, now more than ever — how else are you going to attract a partner, according to Twitch streamers and billions of TikTokers? So, if you’re lacking in the rizz department (and if that’s the case, you’re basically Tom Holland, who famously said “I have no rizz whatsoever.”), read on for how to become a rizz god.

1. Remember people’s names: The No. 1 trick to rizzing someone up is to make them feel like you remember them. This is obviously really hard, as a lot of people are super boring — and that’s not your fault. If you’ve forgotten someone’s name, come up with creative ways to get them to remind you.
2. Be memorable: The flip side of remembering things about people is to make yourself easy to remember. You don’t want to be like Archie from Riverdale, a man with near-negative rizz. I would argue that the Taylor Swift song I Forgot That You Existed is about the experience of watching Archie do whatever he did on television (I can’t recall). So, be memorable. Try wearing something interesting, like an enormous paper clip attached to your shirt, like a tie.
3. Make lots of eye contact: Eye contact is super rizzy, and it’s a surefire way to seduce a romantic interest. Hold eye contact with the people you’re interested in (for everyone else, it’s fine to keep your eyes shut). Don’t go overboard, though. If they say something like “why are you staring at me?” or “weird,” that’s a hint that you should consider looking down. Having rizz is all about adapting to external stimuli.
4. Ask questions: Someone dead once said that you make more friends in two minutes by taking an interest in their lives than you do in two hours by getting them interested in yours. That dude had serious rizz. If you want people to know having rizz is your whole personality, ask them a ton of questions about themselves. But — and this one is really easy to forget — do try to listen to what they say in response. Sometimes, they’ll fire a question back at you, and it’s not rizzy to stare silently into the void when this happens.
5. Having funny anecdotes to tell at parties: People with rizz always have funny stories up their sleeves. So, leap into the party with canned stories in hand, so all the other guests know: the rizz has arrived. But make sure to do a dry run of these stories before the party; sometimes, a story you think is funny is actually a story about childhood neglect. It’s just good to practice them ahead of time.
6. Hair gel: I watched The Golden Bachelor, and yes, I understand the innate biological connection between rizz and hair gel. Not only will it help you attract someone, but also, it will give them something to discuss when the two of you are intimate. They’ll put their hands in your hair, and then, you’ll have to show them where the sink is.
7. Give a lot of compliments: Always have nice things to say about people. But make sure they’re actually nice — don’t tell someone you’re trying to rizz up that their new haircut is “an improvement,” even if it’s true.
8. Receive a lot of compliments: This isn’t necessarily in your control, but if you can find a way to suggest that others compliment you on your rizz, this will go a long way toward making it your whole personality. Maybe try to manifest this or something?
9. Update your social media bios: It’s not just about your IRL conversations; you need rizz to be your whole personality online, too. So, say that in your Twitter bio. Literally write, “My personality is that I have rizz.” It’s sort of low-stakes; no one is using Twitter anymore anyway.
10. Update your Tinder: Just in case your crushes aren’t looking at your Instagram… besides, the point of rizz is to find love. In that sense, it’s exactly like Tinder.
11. Dress badly: Consider Jacob Elordi’s character in Euphoria. You know Nate has rizz, because he dresses horribly (you need rizz to pull off those outfits. Also, being hot like Jacob Elordi helps). So, take a leaf out of Nate’s book, and try dressing badly, to convince people you don’t need to worry about the way you look — your natural charm will take care of things. Here, the paper clip could once again be useful.
12. Change your middle name to “the Rizz:” This is a really helpful signal. No one without rizz would have “The Rizz” as a middle name.
13. Spray-paint the word “Rizz” onto your car: Just in case someone doesn’t follow you online, this is a really clear way to indicate that your personality is rizz.
14. Interrupt every conversation to make sure people saw your car: Because sometimes it’s parked far away, you know?
15. Change your first name to “the Rizz:” No one actually cares about middle names anymore, anyway.
16. Be charismatic: If all else fails, then yes, the trick to rizzing someone up is to simply… have rizz.