Woman Assaults Boyfriend After He Says Her Pasta Is 'OK,' Threatens Cops

*Waits for the person I'm dating to click this headline to see if it's an actual story or just A WARNING.*

I am a very polite person -- I was raised to believe I should just be happy I have food in front of me. Regardless if the food is actually good (or even edible), I will tell whoever cooked it that it is absolutely delicious.

And so should you, unless you want to be attacked over a plate of "just OK" pasta.

Jason Martin was eating lunch made by his girlfriend Jodi Ecklund when she asked him how he liked her spaghetti. He replied it was "OK."

"OK," Jason?! JUST OK?! She slaves over a hot pot of boiling water for roughly eight minutes, unless you want it al dente, and the most you can say is "OK?!"

Jodi didn't take this too well. So, she had a conversation with him asking him to be more appreciative of the hard work she does to make his life a little bit easier.

Just kidding, she allegedly hit him in the head, threw his stuff into the parking lot, barricaded herself in their apartment and now faces six felony charges. As you do.

Police were called to their home in Merrimack, New Hampshire and Jodi treated them to leftover pasta an hours-long standoff.

Jodi allegedly threatened to kill any officer who tried to get inside. At one point, she allegedly told them,

I got the safety off, you can come in now.

Police were forced to evacuate the apartment building while they attempted to reason with her.

Denise Roy, the Merrimack police chief, told Union Leader,

There was more than one gun inside of the residence.

Jodi eventually surrendered and was taken to the hospital to treat self-inflicted injuries. During her arraignment hearing, she said,

I have bipolar disorder. I'm not this monster.

Regardless, she faces charges of criminal mischief, domestic violence simple assault, criminal threatening and reckless conduct.

Citations: Man Tells His Girlfriend Her Pasta Is 'OK', Hours-Long Police Standoff Ensues (Munchies)