6 Ways To Know They’re Not That Interested, Just By How They Text

One of the most obvious signs the person you’re texting isn’t interested, according to online dating expert Julie Spira, is as simple as the length of their messages. “When someone isn’t that into you, their responses to your text messages will be short, as in one to three words,” Spira tells Elite Daily. “By sending a reply with a word or two, if it doesn’t include a cute emoji, GIF, or exclamation point, it’s a sign that the person isn’t into you and they’re responding out of obligation.” Even if she or he replies fast but short, they’re probs not feeling it.

If you want to know how into you someone is, pay attention to how quickly they reply, says NYC relationship expert Susan Winter. “When a person isn't into you, they don't get back to you right away,” she says. “Part of that is on purpose, because they want to push you back. But even if unintentional, lag time shows that you're not a priority and therefore they needn't bother to respond in a timely fashion.” The longer the lag, the less that person likely values the conversation.

When you’re on the move, it’s easy to open up a text and then forget to reply, even if it’s a message from someone you’re excited about. However, Spira says that — when this becomes a frequent occurrence — forgetfulness isn’t the issue. “Everyone is attached to their cell phones, and some people even sleep with theirs like it’s their favorite digital teddy bear," she says. "If the excuse of not seeing your text message becomes a repeated theme, it’s because you’re low on the totem pole.”

One of the best ways to keep a convo flowing is to ask questions. If you find that you’re doing all the legwork in the conversation (and that your crush isn’t giving you much in return), then they may be trying to shut the convo down. “If someone makes statements that don't beg a response, that's a pretty good sign they're not into you,” Traci Brown, body language expert and author of Persuasion Point, previously told Elite Daily. “People will ask questions or send messages that require a response if they're into you.”

Just as you would spellcheck an email before sending to a professor, spellchecking texts indicates that the person sending wants the respect of the person receiving. As April Masini, relationship expert and founder of Relationship Advice Forum previously told Elite Daily, disinterested texters "don’t think about the other person’s experience reading texts that are misspelled, poorly crafted, and not well punctuated." That said, obviously, you shouldn't judge your crush for typos if they have a learning disability or a physical disability that makes typo-free texting more challenging.

If your crush’s texting habits are wildly unpredictable, then you can likely predict their feelings for you are just as inconsistent. “If you’ve been waking up to a good morning text message daily, a ‘sweet dreams’ text at night, and suddenly those messages come to a complete halt, it’s a clear message that your relationship status has already changed," says Spira, adding, “It’s time for you to start looking elsewhere as well.”