Relationships

Here’s How To Overcome Boredom In Your Relationship & Reignite The Spark

by Tayi Sanusi
Updated: 
Originally Published: 

As the initial excitement of the honeymoon phase starts to wind down, settling into a more comfortable rhythm with your partner can be just as gratifying. However, it's all too easy for that comfort to eventually evolve into boredom. Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to overcome boredom in your relationship and reignite the passion. As long as both partners are willing to put in a bit of effort, spicing things up can be a really fun way to reconnect with your bae. And while it might be frightening to acknowledge that the sparks have died down, tackling the issue head-on is key.

According to Daniel Sher, clinical psychologist and a consultant for the Between Us Clinic, many couples start to feel bored with a relationship once they've transitioned out of the initial discovery phase. "This is typically replaced by a feeling of safety and predictability — fertile ground for boredom to grow in," Sher previously told Elite Daily. "Safety and predictability are important, but it’s possible to experience this while also having a relationship that feels enlivening and exciting." So, if you've noticed the dynamic between you and bae hasn't been as fulfilling as it used to be, the good news is all hope is not lost. Here are some ways to avoid letting your relationship become too stale.

01Give Each Other Space To Grow And Pursue Individual Goals

Ania Boniecka/Stocksy

Even though spending all of your time together may have felt amazing in the beginning, once things settle in, giving each other the space to continue growing as individuals is crucial. “If the relationship is stagnant, often the individuals also feel stuck in their life,” relationship and intimacy coach Megan Lambert previously told Elite Daily. “Ask yourself, ‘What do I really want? What is a secret dream of mine I could explore?' Then go out and try it. Often, couples are afraid that if they follow their dreams, it will pull their relationship apart. But you have to risk losing the relationship and follow your interests to keep the spark alive.”

02Never Stop Getting To Know Each Other

If you're feeling nostalgic for the early days when you and your SO were constantly surprising each other, it's totally possible to rekindle that curiosity. Don't assume that just because you've known bae for a while that there's nothing new to discover. “Couples get boring because they assume they know each other already," explained Lambert. "They don't. In every moment, your partner is a new and unique human. Imagine you are an alien meeting your partner for the first time. What would an alien be curious about? What would you want to know? Explore each other as if you were two aliens, totally new, totally fresh.”

03Experiment In The Bedroom

ADDICTIVE CREATIVES/Stocksy

No matter how sexually compatible you are with a partner, there may come a time when your sex life starts to feel way too predictable. This is the perfect opportunity to start experimenting. “Try something new in the bedroom," agreed Sher. "Broadening your sexual horizons and exploring each other’s sexual fantasies can provide a fantastic way to reestablish intimacy and excitement.”

04Go On Weekly Date Nights

Setting aside time for weekly date nights is another way to amp up the romantic vibes. To keep things balanced, you can even take turns planning the dates. If going out for dinner and a movie is getting old, try to think outside the box. Activities such as rock climbing, painting classes, wine tastings, or cooking classes are just a few examples of unique outings that could make for a perfect change of pace.

Ultimately, feeling bored in a relationship doesn't necessarily mean the relationship's reached its expiration date. So, if you've started feeling a bit too comfortable with bae, don't fret. Sometimes, all it takes are a few adjustments to get things back on track.

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