After a breakup, any relief from the heartache is welcome. But some ways to get over the emotions are better and healthier than others. One way that is both healthy and effective is to take control of your self-talk by repeating mantras that will soothe you after a breakup because they reinforce hopeful, positive, and healing ideas. Because honestly, your broken heart could use a little break.
After a relationship ends, I have a tendency to reflexively internalize the whole thing. Clearly, it's my fault, a deficit in myself that lead to things not working out — even when I know in my head it's much more complicated than that, my heart just wants to go there. Which is why mantras are such an important part of healing. It's the way that I mentally push back against the cycle of negative thinking. It's all about taking intentional proactive steps to change the way you are thinking that will, in turn, help soothe your heartache a bit so that you can start to heal. Plus, it’s free and you can even do it while under a pile of blankets and empty ice cream containers. (That can't just be me.)
Not sure where to start? Here are a few positive mantras to try after a breakup to help kickstart the closure.
01This will pass. I was happy before I met them and I will be happy again.
When you are fresh off a breakup, it can feel like you’ll never be happy again. But here’s the thing: You will be. So, it’s good in these moments, when the memory of your ex is looking so large in your mind that to remember that yes, there was a time before you knew them and were happy and content. Which also means that there will come a time that you feel that way again. This mantra will help keep that present in your mind, and maybe even make you feel better right now.
02I am loved, I am lovable, and I am not alone.
Just because your relationship did not end the way you hoped does not reflect how lovable you really are — or how loved you are. This mantra helps to remind you that you are both worthy of love and that there are other people in you life right now who love you. While you may feel alone at times after a breakup, it's always good to remind yourself that you are actually not.
03I am free to be all of me.
When we are in a relationship, there are inevitably some parts of ourselves that get compartmentalized. If there is any silver living to a breakup, it’s that it gives you the the opportunity to unpack those parts of yourself, reexamine them, and just be all of yourself again — while you figure out who you want to me moving into the future.
04Whatever is meant to be will happen.
This mantra is especially helpful if you hope that someday, you and your ex will get back together. It doesn't reinforce false hope — instead, it helps you to trust and accept that what awaits you in the future is what is meant to be — whether your ex is a part of it or not.
05I am healing more every single hour and every single day.
Although in this very second it may not feel like it, the reality is that as each minute, hour, and day passes, you are healing and moving toward a time when you will feel better. While you may not be able to get to that destination right now, it's a good to remember that you are always moving toward it, and closure and healing are on the horizon.
While it may seem like a little thing, just altering what you tell yourself can be incredibly powerful in how it changes the way you feel and how it can help you get on the path to healing your heart.
