Relationships

6 Women Reveal Their Best Friend’s Breakup Advice That Changed Their Life

by Sarah Ellis

Let me confess something — sometimes no matter how much I think I’m over someone, it takes an intervention from my friend group to remind me that I reallllyyy need to move on. After a bad relationship ends, it'll seem like I’m on top of the world, reclaiming my independence and living by my own rules. But secretly, maybe I’m not quite there. No worries, though, because my friends know the real story, and they’re always happy to cheer me up. If you’re looking for breakup advice to give your best friend, my squad sure knows what they’re talking about.

Breakups suck a lot, no matter how much we might try to tell ourselves that we’re feeling totally fine about them. If you’ve got a great friend group that knows your heart, you can lean on them when things get super rough. Friends can remind you that you won’t always feel this way, that it’s totally possible to move on, and that having fun with your pals is mandatory breakup recovery. Honestly, I don’t think I’d ever be able to move on from a failed relationship if I didn’t have my friends right by my side. To help you and your pals build each other up, here’s a list of BFF advice that can make even the worst splits just a bit easier to handle.

Remember the Why

Stocksy/Mosuno
You didn’t make the decision (to break up with someone) based on your current feelings. A friend told me that and it was life-changing.

— Bri, 24

You're Worth More

Stocksy/Kkgas
My best friend told me, ‘Your ex isn’t worth it,’ and honestly, I needed that.

— Shannon, 24

Trust Your Gut

Stocksy/Evgenij Yulkin
Often we stay in relationships for convenience — we live with them, have the same friends, have intertwined lives. But switch your mindset to, ‘Today’s convenience is robbing you of your future happiness' … How [do you] know when to break up? Really, even if you don’t want to know, you know… so trust your gut.

— Diamond, 25

Be Kind to Yourself

Stocksy/Jovo Jovanovic
When going through a tough breakup, it’s OK to tell yourself you’ll be together again until either you work it out or it doesn’t matter anymore because you’ve moved on.

— Melissa, 26

Keep It Real

Stocksy/Lauren Naefe
I'm a writer, and especially when I was getting started in this industry, a lot of my writing drew inspiration from my personal experiences. It took me about two years to heal and move on after my first bad breakup, and I remember feeling pretty proud when I finally told my best friend I was over my ex. Her response was, 'Really? Because you're still writing about him. A lot.' Her comment helped me realize that healing from a breakup isn't a quick thing. It's OK if it takes you longer than you thought it would. You didn't fall in love in a day, and you can't force yourself out of it in a day, either.

— Hannah, 25

Not-So-Fast Friends

Stocksy/GIC
You can’t be friends with your ex until you get to the point where they could tell you, ‘Hey, I’m seeing someone else,’ and you would be genuinely happy for them.

— Victoria, 24

Preach it, ladies. A lot of times even when we know a breakup is the right thing, it can be difficult to process once it happens. Lean into your besties’ advice when you’re feeling low, and remember that dating is always going to feel like a work in progress. You may never be certain of a decision when you make it, but trust your gut that you are doing what’s best for you. You can do this!