There are plenty of reasons a woman would want to date while pregnant. She may no longer be romantically involved with the person she conceived the child with, she could have chosen a sperm donor while single, or she could be a queer single woman who wanted to carry a child – these are just a few potential reasons. And just because she's expecting doesn't mean she's no longer interested in feeling romantically or sexually desirable. So, dating while pregnant is definitely a thing.
I was curious about the different dating experiences that women have during their pregnancies, so I started reading accounts online. Some women said they've faced stigma around their choices. People sometimes question why they're on dating apps and if they're really prioritizing motherhood (wow, who knew you could only focus on one thing at a time?). Others go as far as to slut-shame women for dating while pregnant. Basically, people have a lot of opinions and don't stay in their lanes. Below, three women offer their perspectives on what it's like to date while pregnant.
This woman found a relationship.
This Reddit user was pregnant with her daughter while in her early 20s. She said that the father of her child left her during her pregnancy, which made her closed off to the idea of being in another relationship at the time.
"I decided to make it very clear to anyone that took an interest in me that I was pregnant and if they decide to continue talking to me, don't expect anything serious, I'm not ready for it," she said on Reddit. "I set up a few dates with a few people and either they decided they couldn't handle the pregnancy or I couldn't vibe with them."
She ended up finding someone a year younger than her. She told him how many weeks pregnant she was, and that she didn't expect him to be a dad to her baby. They made their relationship official a month into dating, and he took an active role in being supportive to her through her pregnancy.
"My partner will kiss my stomach and he loves to talk to my daughter," she said. "Dating while pregnant is a hit-or-miss thing. You'll get the people with pregnancy fetishes, and you'll get some genuine people. And who knows, the genuine ones might change your mind. Go for it, and have some fun. You'll really enjoy having someone around to share in the kicks and movements with."
This woman is hesitant to start dating again, but supports other women who are ready.
"I think about dating all the time," said a woman on What To Expect, a pregnancy discussion forum. "My relationship ended in July, just a few weeks after we found out I was pregnant. His verbal abuse and insistence for me to abort made it easier for me to let go of our [four-and-a-half] years together. However, I'm really hesitant to jump into anything and quite honestly, I haven't even tried dating. But I see nothing wrong with it as long as you're upfront, safe, and proceed with caution."
This woman now lives with the man she met while pregnant.
Another woman on the previously mentioned pregnancy discussion form said, quite correctly, that there's "nothing wrong with dating" while pregnant.
When she was six months pregnant by donor, she met her neighbor who was going through a divorce, and they realized they had things in common.
"We grew into loving each other and became a couple," she said. "He was there when I gave birth to my son. We live together now since the summer and my son calls him 'daddy.' I'm pregnant with my second child now from the same donor because my boyfriend had a vasectomy and we are so happy together!"
In advice that could be applicable to anyone attempting to date, she said, "Open your eyes a little wider and consider nice [people] that may not seem [like] your type and you might be surprised."
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