If You've Been Stood Up, Repeat These 9 Affirmations

It's never your fault if someone stands you up. They probably did it because they were afraid of your response if they told you they couldn't make it, and that's cowardly on their part. It's definitely not about you — you didn't do anything wrong to bring this upon yourself.

You deserve respect from anyone who's agreed to go on a date with you (and everyone, to be honest). If someone stands you up, they're not showing you respect, and you deserve better. In fact, you deserve someone who's excited to be on a date with you, and trust me — that person is out there.

It's up to you if you want to feel sad about being stood up. Your friends might instinctively try to comfort you when you tell them, but you can decide for yourself if it's something you're upset about. After all, it's your life.

Maybe I'm giving people too much credit here, but I think if someone has plans with you and completely ignores them without even giving you a warning, they must know they've done something wrong. You don't have to feel good about someone else feeling bad (even if they did just stand you up), but know that you're not the only one struggling.

Just because your date didn't show up doesn't mean your night has to suck. You're all decked out, so paint the town (if you want). Text your friends (or maybe an old flame), and keep the evening going! Or introduce yourself to the people around you. That said, if you feel crappy and want to curl up at home with Halo Top and The Bold Type, don't feel bad about doing that, either.

You don't need to beat yourself up about being upset — no one likes being stood up. It's completely normal to feel like sh*t, and if you want to spend the evening wallowing, don't feel guilty for doing that.

Even if your date had shown up, you don't want to date the type of person who would stand someone up. In a way, you dodged a bullet because they showed you their true colors early, so you didn't have to wait to find out who they really are.

Do I mean someone who actually shows up for dates? Yes. But also someone who just completely connects with you, so that if they are running late or something comes up, they're not afraid to tell you. And they know you'll understand, because you're confident in the fact that they want to see you. Yes, it might seem hard to imagine that person when you've just been stood up, but trust me — they're out there.

I know I said this one before, but it's really important, so I thought I'd repeat it: It's not your fault.

Getting stood up feels horrible. You might be all dressed up and waiting at a bar you don't even like. Maybe you've told everyone you have a date, and you know they'll ask how it went. You don't have to share any details you don't want (and it's OK to make something up, too, if you don't want to admit you were stood up). Nothing can make getting stood up feel fun, but these mantras can make you feel better about it. Just remember — it's not your fault. You'll have many better dates to come!