Julia Has Major Regrets About Sheridan & All Her 'Listen To Your Heart' Drama

Every Bachelor show needs a villain. For many viewers of Listen To Your Heart, that was Julia Rae Schlucter. Though the singer's four-episode run on the musical Bachelor spinoff started off strong, her messy Sheridan-Brandon-Savannah drama (plus some beef with Natascha on the side) had fans singing a different tune about her. Following her elimination during the May 4 episode of Listen To Your Heart, Julia is opening up about her regrets from her time on the show — and there are a lot of them.

"I'm watching it back and I'm like, 'What the hell were you thinking?'" Julia tells Elite Daily. Many fans have the same question, especially while watching Episode 4. After coupling up with Sheridan Reed, the nice guy who was totally smitten with her, Julia realized she still wanted to pursue a relationship with Brandon, the ladies' man who was coupled up with fellow contestant Savannah McKinley at the same time.

"My spark with [Brandon] was real, but it was the kind of spark that fizzles really fast, and I was having a real hard time deciphering that from the connection I had with Sheridan," Julia says.

In a decision that ultimately got her sent home, Julia chose to continue her journey with Brandon, meaning Sheridan and Savannah both left the show. This move did not sit well with fans.

Though parting ways with Sheridan was tough for Julia, at the time, she was still excited to sing in front of judges with her new duet partner, Brandon. However, right before their first performance together (40 minutes before they took the stage, according to Julia), fellow contestant Natascha Bessez dropped a bombshell on Julia, saying Brandon admitted he would have stayed with Savannah if she hadn't decided to leave. The interaction shook Julia, but instead of getting mad at Brandon, she was mostly pissed at Natascha for telling her this when she did, and she blamed her shaky performance and eventual elimination in part on her fellow contestant. In hindsight, though, Julia is more chill about the whole thing.

"I don't know that had she malicious intent — I don't think she did," Julia says. "I think she genuinely wanted to tell me like, 'Yo, girl. Your guy is not good,' but I think the fact that she waited to tell me at that moment did not sit well with me."

Julia is fully aware how her behavior on the show has come off to fans. "I am cringing while watching myself back," she admits. However, the backlash is a lot to handle. "I am getting a lot of hate. Honestly, this is the first day that I haven't cried yet. I've been in such a dark place because of it. I made mistakes, I'm happy to own up to them."

Part of owning up to her mistakes has included reaching out to her fellow contestants. Following filming, she's contacted Savannah, Brandon, and Natascha to make amends (though she says she never heard back from Natascha). But the person she's most interested in patching things up with is Sheridan.

"I definitely still have feelings for him. I'm heartbroken things went the way they did, and I take full responsibility for that," she says. "I'm kicking myself because [he's] the kind of partner that I know is the one that I would want in this life."

Julia says she spoke with Sheridan almost daily after production wrapped. Since then, however, their communication has slowed. "I'm hopeful that after it all settles a little bit, he's able to remember the connection we had," she says. "I thought we made an amazing team."

Though Julia is still processing her whole Listen To Your Heart experience, she already has hopes fans viewers will learn from her mistakes: "Trust your gut — it's why I ended up going with Sheridan originally, because I knew something was off with Brandon and I's connection. I think your heart can get really confused when you have that spark with someone," she says. "You have to trust your gut not your heart."

Hear that, Chris Harrison? If you want the contestants to find love that lasts, you might consider changing the show's title to Listen To Your Gut instead.

The Bachelor Presents: Listen To Your Heart continues Mondays at 8 p.m. ET on ABC.