This Is Why You Shouldn't Text Your High School Ex When You're Home For Thanksgiving
Maybe it’s the turkey, or it could be the whole going around the table and saying what you're thankful for thing. Whatever the reason, Thanksgiving dinner can have you feeling extra warm and fuzzy. Do yourself a favor and put those good feelings toward Black Friday shopping or taking a tryptophan-induced nap. Do not, under any circumstances, take this relaxing time at home as an opportunity to reach out to your high school ex.
Whether you just started your first semester of college, or you’ve been back for Thanksgiving multiple times, it’s normal to reminisce when you return to your hometown after being away at school. You start thinking about how everything was simpler in high school, and how cute your high school sweetheart was back then. Maybe you’ve had a few pumpkin beers, which definitely won’t help the situation. You could admit to feeling lonely, or you might tell yourself that you only want to wish your ex a "Happy Thanksgiving" in a totally platonic way.
Whatever your internal monologue, I’d advise against acting on those feelings, and experts agree. We all know how an out-of-the-blue text from an old flame can stir up old emotions and lead to confusion and even more heartbreak. A little bit of nostalgia is fine, but don’t let it get in the way of what the holidays are really about.
It boils down to a simple fact — one that may be hard to hear. "If he or she wants you back, they know how to reach you," board-certified psychiatrist Dr. Susan Edelman told Elite Daily earlier this month. All relationships are a two-way street. Your ex can pick up the phone just as easily as you can, so if he or she hasn't contacted you, it might mean they don't want to.
If this bit of tough love doesn't do the trick, consider why you feel the need to text your high school ex in the first place. What are your true intentions? What would be your ideal outcome? "Most times, we crave going back to an ex because it's comfortable, and because we're scared of the unknown. But just because you don't know what (or who) else is out there, doesn't mean it won't be even better than what you do know (your ex)," Krissy Dolor, Director of Client Success at eFlirt told Elite Daily.
Instead of dwelling on the past, focus on having fun on your own. You may meet someone great, but you can't do that while you're still stuck on your high-school beau. Open yourself up to new possibilities — good things tend to come into your life when you are least expecting them.
If you're thinking of texting your ex because you crave closure, it's important to know that unfortunately, relationships don't always end the way you'd like them to. Sure, it'd be nice if you and your ex could tie things up with a nice little bow, but depending on the situation, you might not even get close to that. "Your ex might not give you the closure you need, so instead, see if you can move past your relationship on your terms," said Dolor. Do your best to not let your ex take control of your emotions.
Nine times out of ten, texting your ex isn't a good idea. It brings up old feelings, and if they do end up answering, it can lead to rehashing the same arguments over and over. I get it: dating is hard, and an old relationship can feel like home. The fact is, though, eventually we all have to move out — and move on.
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