Jimmy Kimmel Translating Cardi & Offset's "Clout" For Old People Is Hilarious

Jimmy Kimmel gets it, you guys. Usually, I like to stand up on a soapbox and shout about the lack of diversity in late-night television, but I stan for my boy Kimmel. I feel like he's someone who has proven he's capable of evolving (the man used to host a show called The Man Show, for crying out loud) and hasn't sacrificed real humor, either. The video of Jimmy Kimmel translating Cardi B and Offset's "Clout" lyrics so "old people" can understand it is a stellar example of what I mean. Way to merge your old and new audiences, Jim. Can I call ya Jim?

It doesn't hurt that Cardi B and Offset are two of the most likable people on the planet. Part of what makes them so endearing is their knack for pulling a catchphrase out of thin air. It's also what makes them such great rappers. Their ability to twist and turn a rhyme or spin a phrase has made for some incredible stand-out lyrics and Kimmel wanted to highlight this on his show.

Kimmel opened up his segment "New Lyrics For Old People" by explaining there is a lot of new lingo out there and he's there to bridge the gap so older music listeners can enjoy the new wave. Offset wrote the song "Clout" and kicked the segment off by rapping his original lyrics which Kimmel then translated. Here is how Kimmel broke down the words.

Offset rapped: "Straight out the streets to a penthouse, Miami beach. Yayo."

Kimmel translated: "I came from humble beginnings and now I own a condominium in Florida. Yayo."

You guys immediately get the idea.

Offset continued, "Swapping our cars with my b*tch. I bought her the Lambo she bought me the Wraith."

Kimmel's take: "That means his wife and I exchanged cars and jewelry."

Some of my other favorite translations include Cardi's lyrics, "Whole lotta people need to hear this. It's a lotta names on my hit list," which Kimmel explained as, "Everyone listen closely because I'm upset with a lot of you." She also rapped the words, "Mouth still say what it wants to. [Vagina] still wet like a big b*tch," which Kimmel translated as, "I believe in free speech and I am sexually aroused."

To be clear, Cardi B corrected him on that last one explaining, "no it doesn't mean that." I'll let you scrub to the 2:00 timestamp to see what she means.

Fortunately, Kimmel can take a note and thanked her for correcting him.

Honestly, I could have watched them go all night. At the end of the segment, Kimmel summed up the song in it's totality, stating: "I think what we've learned here is that there are a lot of people who are trying really to kinda take some of your fame by taking shots at you and you guys have had enough of it, yes?" Offset's response? — "They'd do anything for clout."

Ugh. So wise. So smart. So cool.