I Went To A Psychic Reading On A First Date

First dates in the summertime are utterly whimsical. You can throw on a little dress, people-watch at a scenic sidewalk table, and jaunt all the way home, tipsy on two Aperol spritzes and the adrenaline of what could be. First dates in the fall, on the other hand, are the absolute worst. Who wants to layer a puffer coat over a crop top, pay $30 for an Uber, and meet inside a bar where you make small talk about the chilly weather? Not me, girl. Not me.

You might be thinking “But Mia! There are so many adorable fall dates, like apple-picking or visiting a pumpkin patch!” While I appreciate the thought, those are relationship dates, not first dates. That’s the kind of date you go on once someone is already comfortable taking your Instagram pictures. Also, I have no interest in meeting a random Hinge guy for the first time in any setting that involves vast, maze-like fields.

As a single gal who lives for casual dating and has no interest in celebrating cuffing season, I knew I needed to spice up fall first dates, stat. No snuggling on the couch, no movie marathons, no fields or patches of any kind. I needed something witchy. So what did I land on? I took a first date to a psychic, of course.

Step 1: Find A Date (Why Was This So Hard?)

To my surprise, it was shockingly difficult to find someone to partake in this project with me. Not only were people skeptical of the activity, but they also weren’t psyched to go on a date that would be written about. It appears that the more I share about my dating life online, the less people want to go on dates with me. Who would’ve thought?

Then, like my knight in shining armor, I received a match from Sam*, a 6-foot-5 dreamboat who had both Twilight and High School Musical references in his profile. I nervously pitched the idea to him, feeling traumatized by past reactions, but his response was the greenest flag ever: “That sounds incredibly weird,” he said. “I’m in.”

His up-for-anything attitude put me at ease for the wacky hang ahead. And instead of exchanging awkward, dry messages leading up to the date (“How was your day? What do you do for work? What does being a ‘banker’ entail?”), Sam and I could message about the activity our hang was centered on (“Have you ever had a psychic reading? Are you nervous? What color do you think your aura is?”).

As I thanked him for agreeing to this unorthodox scheme, he said, “Thank you for asking me. I have been really disinterested in going on dates lately, but this is at least something different.” It was then that I realized it wasn’t just me who wanted a fall dating shake-up. Sam, too, needed a Hot Autumn Hang. So off to the psychic we went.

Step 2: Get Waayyy Too Personal With Each Other

We both agreed that a drink or two was necessary to pregame our reading, so at 7:30 p.m. on a crisp Monday evening, I met Sam at a bar in Gramercy Park in NYC. Neither of us were certain what skeletons may be revealed during our psychic endeavor, so it was fun to try to catch each other up on who we are and what areas we needed supernatural guidance on.

I told him about my writing, my last breakup, and my severe middle-child syndrome. He told me about his family in Boston, feeling unsure about living in NYC, and his six-month expiration date on situationships. As we walked into the psychic’s space, I felt like we were a team: armed with knowledge about each other and ready to lend support no matter how it went.

Step 3: See My Future — & Find Out If Sam Is A Part Of It

“You were a man in a past life” was the first thing the psychic told me. Instantly, Sam and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. I couldn’t have asked for a better, more out-of-pocket opener to break the ice. I tend to be very forward and assertive, so right off the bat, I felt seen by the tarot cards in front of me. And by the transitive property, I felt like Sam got to see me, too.

Other elements that the tarot revealed were harder to confirm. I learned that I will date an older lawyer who will take me to Europe, but eventually I’ll kick him to the curb because he “bores me.” (Hi, please come soon, I need a vacay.) Someone from my past is going to come out of the woodwork but only to try to screw things up. (You know who you are. Stay away!) And supposedly, I will have a home birth for my three children. (I’m sorry, but the only thing in my future is an epidural.)

Sam’s reading was just as, if not more, accurate than my own. The psychic quickly had both of our jaws on the floor when he asked, “Are you going to Boston soon?” Neither of us had mentioned the city or the fact that Sam’s family lives there. Sam said, shocked, “Yes, in two weeks. To visit my niece.” With no hesitation, the psychic said, “You need to live there.”

For the rest of our readings, we got to sit back and watch each other’s lives unfold — what age we will get married, when we will have kids, warnings we should look out for, and skills we should lean into. At the end, we each asked one question.

“Why am I lonely?” Sam asked earnestly. I couldn’t believe how vulnerable he was willing to be in front of me. For a moment, I think we both forgot we were on a first date.

“Are we compatible?” I asked, a much less vulnerable question. “Extremely,” the psychic said. “You have the potential to be not just partners but best friends.” I thought back to our pre-psychic drinks, when we fell down a Love Island rabbit hole — discussing past seasons, our favorite couples, and deeply analyzing Molly-Mae and Tommy Fury’s breakup. I wasn’t sure yet where we stood on a romantic level, but I liked thinking that the psychic could be right.

Step 4: Schedule More Hot Autumn Hangs

As I bid adieu to Sam and journeyed home, I felt all the fizzy feelings of a summertime date: giddy, optimistic, and excited for the season ahead. My hopes had been confirmed: With the right activity and the right company, fall dating can still be flirty and casual — no need to lock someone down unless you want to.

I admit that with a different person, this date could have gone all wrong — it could have been awkward or uncomfortable or straight-up weird. But I also think it was a great test of our compatibility: I’m looking for someone who likes to try new things, who can be goofy and vulnerable, and who wants to keep dating spicy. Those personality traits were revealed much faster over a psychic reading than they would have over small talk and spritzes.

What does the future look like for me and Sam? We’ve texted occasionally, but he hasn’t proposed a second date yet. If he doesn’t ask me soon, I think I’ll go ahead and pop the question. It’s time I embrace the man the psychic saw inside of me.