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Here’s How One Guy Is Using Twitter To Dodge Paying His Taxes

by Taylor Ortega
YouTube

Brandon Scott Wolf is not trying to be the Jim Jones of social media, so please stop saying that.

Brandon Scott Wolf is merely trying to achieve tax-exempt status through his Twitter following.

In 2015, the Brooklyn-based comedian launched both DateBrandonScottWolf.com to find a soulmate and FightBrandonScottWolf.com to challenge Floyd Mayweather to a sanctioned boxing match at Las Vegas' MGM Grand and claims to have succeeded on both fronts.

Brandon's newest venture, FollowBrandonScottWolf.com, offers us -- people who are not Brandon Scott Wolf -- a chance to dedicate ourselves to something bigger than mere humanity.

He sees himself as a Christ of the modern age, which is only insane if you make a big deal out of him saying it.

Brandon told Elite Daily,

Every religious leader has followers and I'm no different. Though, unlike Jesus Christ or Charles Manson, my followers are all on Twitter. Social media is a great way to bestow enlightenment upon the masses. Right now, I don't have enough followers hearing my message to legally be viewed as a religion in the eyes of the United States government, but I assure you that will probably change.

In the event Brandon can amass 100,000 Twitter followers (he now has just over 8,400), he hopes to achieve tax-exempt status as a religion, NOT a cult, and he's confident he'll make it happen.

He said,

Just take a look at my track record: I launched DateBrandonScottWolf.com and now I have a really great girlfriend. I launched FightBrandonScottWolf.com and that coward Floyd 'Money' Mayweather retired. That's two for two. Mark my words. I will be three for three. Or perhaps even better: Three for two.

Whether any of this is technically true doesn't matter as much as Brandon's conviction and his plans as a future religious leader.

When asked if he feared legal repercussions for using religion to avoid paying taxes the way organizations like the Church of Scientology have long been suspected of doing, Brandon insisted he had nothing to hide and therefore, nothing to fear.

He explained,

I don't have any fear of legal repercussion because I am a religion. A real religion. One that's as legitimate, if not more legitimate, than other legitimate religions like Judaism, Scientology and even that one weird one with the spaghetti monster God.

Brandon vows that those who devote themselves to his cause and help him reach 100,000 followers will be bountifully repaid in the form of enlightenment, jokes and breaking news, as well as "occasionally checking in on the trending @midnight hashtag, and of course, maintaining a tax-exempt status."

In the promotional video on Brandon's site, he admits his current fanbase consists "primarily of [his] mom's friends." For millennials concerned his content won't speak to their demographic, it's like, stop that. Just don't worry about that.

He said,

I'm not only a millennial myself, but I'm also a self-proclaimed 'voice of a generation.' It may not be this generation, but I assure you I'm the voice of a generation. Which one? Follow and we will find out together. I could be the next Lena Dunham.

Brandon, who at this very moment sports a haircut Lena Dunham probably had at some point during her five years on HBO's "Girls," is young and cool enough to trust, but wise enough to guide you.

He added,

The turtleneck was a gift from my mom. She's a good woman.

To enlist your soul and services, check out FollowBrandonScottWolf.com and follow Brandon Scott Wolf on Twitter.