27 Ways Every Girl Has Been That Basic B*tch On Instagram
Instagram is a revolutionary platform of social media and if you don't agree, well maybe you're just not following the right people.
Unlike Facebook, Instagram isn't just limited to your "friends." You can follow fashion bloggers, fitness gurus (shout out: Jen Selter) and celebrities, which makes you feel like you are actually connected to them.
From #foodporn, to #fitfam, to the basic creation of selfies -- has the Instagram craze gone too far? Sure, we may have put our self-worth into the hands of our followers, but let's be real -- isn't that what social media is all about? You put your photos out there for the world to see and watch as the "likes" roll in.
Who loves Instagram the most? Basic bitches, that's who. And guess what? I'm probably one of them (actually I'm definitely one of them) and chances are you are, too.
But how do you know if you fall under this category? Do you upload pictures of your pet thinking everyone cares?
Do you love posting Marilyn Monroe quotes of things she didn't even actually say? Congratulations and welcome to the club, we are happy to have you.
Side note: All photos have been pre-approved for sarcastic purposes only. All participating parties are more than well-aware of their inclusion in this article. So take a note from them, relax and learn to laugh at the inner basic bitch in all of us.
1. A photo of you having the best hair day, ever.
You know you are having a great day when your hair looks flawless. But, wait, what if there is no one to witness this glorious day?
Don't worry that's what Instagram is for! Now your amazing hair day will be plastered on social media for you and everyone to see. Genius.
2. The typical day of the week picture
No, seriously, thank you for the reminder that it's only TUESDAY. Without your informative Instagram photo, I would have absolutely no idea that there are still three more days until Friday.
Excuse me while I go cry into my coffee and breakfast sandwich.
3. The skinny arm picture
Achieving the perfect skinny arm is a difficult task, as any sorority girl will tell you. You know how it goes: hand on the hip, twist your body in an unnatural and uncomfortable way and BAM! #defaultpic.
4. A birthday collage
Is your friend really a friend if she didn't make you a birthday collage? Not in this day and age she isn't.
This is the 2014 version of a birthday card, but shame on you if you only choose pictures that you look good in. You aren't fooling anyone, especially the birthday girl.
5. The girl who only went to a concert for the photo
Do you even know more than three songs by this artist? If he or she were played on the radio or the Top 20 countdown, I'm sorry that doesn't count.
"Lights" is not Ellie Goulding's favorite track and I can guarantee you that it physically pains her to sing that song at every show.
6. The picture of a girl at a sporting event who doesn't know what sport is being played
#Guilty. We may deck ourselves out head to toe in the apparel of "our team," but let's be honest -- do we even know what is going on half of the time?
You go Glen Coco if you actually know how many points a safety or field goal is worth.
7. The #foodporn of a dinner entree she probably did not eat
There is no way you actually inhaled those cheeseburgers, there is just no way! One is maybe yours and the other is definitely somebody else's.
But everyone knows that girl who posts pictures of food that make you suspicious of whether she is really eating it or not.
8. #Dogporn
Newsflash: No one cares except for you.
9. #TBT to Spring Break
#TBT to your beach body! Everyone knows exactly what you are doing when you post pictures throwing it back to your better, fitter days. It's okay, we'll still throw you a like, I mean just look at that tan!
10. The family photo you feel obligated to like
Grandma, please don't cut me off for posting this close-up photo of you. You are hot and single and Instagram needs to see it, plus it's a guaranteed likeable picture.
11. Selfies, duh
Girls love selfies and what better platform to exploit them on than Instagram? I personally don't have the balls to upload a selfie, but hey girl, do you.
12. The single girl's anti-Valentine's Day post
Nothing says typical quite like a single girl bashing Valentine's Day. Of course, if this girl had a boyfriend, her attitude would be the opposite, but until that happens, you will find her venting via social media.
13. The post-breakup Instagram
Instagram is basically a diary since a picture is worth a thousand words. What does this photo have to say? Single and ready to mingle.
14. The "I waited three hours on line to take one picture"
I never even heard of David Zwirner before waiting three hours to enter his NYC exhibit, but the second I saw someone post a picture of it, I knew I had to go. #Basic. #NoShame.
15. The "I look so good and no one can tell I ate Chipotle for dinner" photo
Cue the music to "Best of Both Worlds."
16. Some form of vacation picture involving hot dog legs or your gym-ready body
If you went on vacation and didn't post a picture on Instagram, did it ever really happen? How else are you going to show off all the hard work and effort you put into the gym before jetting off to your destination.
17. The reliving your glory days photo
Tailgating or visiting your Alma Mater are Instagram classics. It may sound pathetic, but it's the truth. The only thing girls love more than going to college is reliving their glory days.
18. A really deep, philosophical and inspirational quote
Some girls love being philosophical despite the fact that they are probably the antithesis of everything Plato considered good and holy in this world.
19. The girl who dropped $32 on a candle for the picture
Girls love candles. I don't know why as an air freshener costs $3 and basically does the exact same thing... right? But if a girl is lighting a candle on any given night, chances are she's posting it on Instagram.
20. The "I'm so trendy and a yogi" picture
Apparently being a "yogi" is in these days? Just because you can stand in tree pose for five seconds doesn't mean you qualify as a yogi. However, it does make for some pretty awesome Instagram photos (see above).
21. Sushi
"What should we eat tonight?" "Sushi!!!," said every girl ever. I don't know what girls love more: eating the sushi or taking pictures of it.
22. The "my best friend is cooler than yours" photo
This is a twisted way of taking a selfie but it's not really a selfie is it? Taking solo shots of your friends is a favorite pastime of many females. It's a way to show off what you are doing by having someone else in the spotlight.
23. The celebrity Insta shot
Pictures of you with a celebrity will be an instant crowd pleaser. You hope and pray that tagging this star in your shot will ensure a like or a follow from him or her -- too bad it never does.
24. The girl who doesn't understand what a #hashtag is
#Please #Do #So #Much #Less
25. "Twinning"
Girls love matching looks, especially when it wasn't on "purpose." We're onto you, we are onto you.
26. Drinking trendy drinks
Bring on the sugar and the calories. There's nothing a girl loves to pair her sushi with more than a trendy alcoholic beverage. But first, let me take a selfie.
27. Anything and everything pertaining to Starbucks
How could girls live without Starbucks? Now that it is adding wine to its menu, just wait for the Instagram photos to triple.
Perhaps the most prevalent form of a Starbucks picture is a barista's hilarious misspelling of a girl's name, like OMG biggest deal ever.
Photo Courtesy: We Heart It
