Lifestyle

16 Reasons Bitchy Resting Face Is A Bigger Epidemic Than Ebola In NYC

by Ashley Fern
Stocksy

Disclaimer: We do not intend to diminish the devastating impact that Ebola is having in West Africa. Ebola is a very serious disease and it should not be trivialized. However, it's important to keep things in perspective and to learn about the facts surrounding this virus.

At the moment, Ebola poses a far greater threat to West Africa than it does to America, and this is what we should concentrate on. If you want more information check out this article from Elite Daily or the CDC's website.

Ebola seems to be the new buzzword on the streets, as it's been throwing people into mass panic everywhere. Despite the fact that 99.9 percent of people have no idea what they are saying, they continue to throw the word around casually, which just perpetuates the cycle of ignorance.

I mean there are much more pressing things out there to be afraid of than Ebola in America... like running into your ex-boyfriend without any makeup on or stepping in dog sh*t in your brand new Jeffrey Campbell boots.

And there is one epidemic that is much more prominent than Ebola in this country, and I guarantee if you look around RIGHT NOW, you would be able to figure out what it is. That's right, it's bitchy resting face.

Before we go any further, let's define BRF:

And what does Urban Dictionary have to say about Ebola?

See where the dilemma occurs? Because, as everyone knows, that's not really what Ebola is, but alas it has become overused and overhyped, and everyone is now treating it as such.

So why should you be much, much more concerned with sufferers of BRF than the Ebola disease? Well...

1. There are 8.4 million people in NYC, approximately 53 percent of whom are women

...Which would mean at least 90 percent of this demographic suffers from bitchy resting face. I mean, come on, is anyone ever really smiling in New York?

2. The doctor who has Ebola has a fiancée

...So he isn't running around exchanging bodily fluids with anyone except for her. FYI: She has been quarantined as well.

3. BRF leaves you much more at risk of being single than Ebola

Because clearly even people with Ebola can have fiancées.

4. People don't empathize with BRF

Ebola quarantine honestly sounds pretty good on a Monday morning — Main Line Douche (@MainLineDouche) October 27, 2014

They don't care if you really are happy on the inside because the face you're displaying on the outside is far from friendly.  

5. BRF is more contagious than Ebola

It's as contagious as yawning and to put it in perspective, the common cold is more contagious than Ebola.  

6. A blood transfusion won't cure BRF

Actually nothing will cure BRF. 

7. At some point, your Ebola quarantine may end, but your BRF never will

This is a life sentence whether you like it or not.  

8. There is no treatment plan for BRF

Once you have BRF, you have it for life. Even though you may realize you have it, there really is no hope of fixing it... ever – even if you try.

9. People don't take your BRF seriously

They just think you are acting like a pretentious a-hole.

10. People consider your BRF a "you problem"

But really the only people who aren't fans of your BRF are all the people who have to look at you. You don't really see a problem with your face.

11. You're more likely to find BRF in a bowling alley than Ebola

There is little to no chance that any female would decide to be in a bowling alley of her own free will, which is why she is chilling in the alley with her BRF on.

12. BRF is more likely to be airborne

"Ebola? The @#1airborne killer we should worry about is BULLETS!" — Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) October 28, 2014

There are a lot other pressing problems that are airborne we probably should be paying equal attention to.

13. Not enough people are freaking out about BRF

Just look at these 17 situations a girl with BRF has found herself in.

14. There are no BRF PSAs on the news

Only on YouTube...

15. There are no hazmat suits designed to protect people from your BRF

Nothing can fully protect anyone from your mean and horrible glares.

16. BRF is one constant ailment, there are no waves or fluctuations

There is no remission; there are no off days. There is only full-fledged meanness displayed on a constant basis.

Photo Courtesy: MTV/The Hills