Relationships

To The Guy Who Gave Me Nothing To Work With: I Moved On And You're Alone

by Jenn Chan
Stocksy

Staying in control of your relationship and communicating with a guy without drama might be hard when he’s throwing you mixed signals.

However, in reality, the common mistake women make in relationships, which leads to unnecessary heartaches, is self-deception. We tend to pick up on the signals we want to receive. When such happens, we sometimes forget all the things that he doesn’t do, or isn’t doing right.

Needless to say, not everything we feel could be thoroughly expressed to that guy without coming off as too needy. As oblivious as guys seem, they are incredibly skilled at picking up on neediness.

So, here’s a letter to the guy you liked, who did not put in enough effort to pull for your relationship to work. Maybe writing a letter will help you move on from the annoyance and disappointment that comes with this all-too-common situation.

Dear Guy I Really Liked,

We get along tremendously. I’m very comfortable and happy when I’m with you. I get giddy when I receive your messages or calls, and even my friends know it’s you on the phone because I’m smiling from ear to ear.

I liked the idea of us, so it does suck to have to let that go. I felt like I was always the one to put more time and effort into us, but I didn’t mind because I liked you, a lot. Looking back now, I just wish you had done the same.

Your text responses were much more frequent when we first started talking. As time progressed, your text responses slowed down, or you would just disappear altogether.

It made me question whether you were talking to other girls or simply disinterested. We use to talk on the phone, Skype and FaceTime. Then, I was at the bottom of your call list. You made it clear that you weren’t interested in talking all the time, but rather, only when you were in the mood.

You were still using dating and hook-up apps like Tinder. Your Snapchat score was ever-increasing, and it didn’t help that your Snapchat best friends were all girls.

I felt like I always wanted to see you, more than you wanted to see me. Although it was a trek to see you, I didn’t mind. I didn’t want to come off as needy, but if I had the option to see you more than I did, I would have in a heartbeat.

I felt that you weren’t making me a priority, most likely giving some other girls the attention.

I guess I was slightly daydreaming about how fantastic the relationship could have been. I didn’t see that you didn’t know what to do about any sort of relationship. I was certain that you were terrified of the “what are we?" conversation.

You barely made an effort to see me, commit to me or allow the relationship to grow. I get it; you just weren’t that into me. It’s fine now because you reminded me that I should never settle for anything less than the best.

Needless to say, I just want you to know that I genuinely care for you. Although you ruffled my feathers a bit, I must admit, I’ve had a good time with you.

You still cross my mind from time to time, and a bit of me hopes that I cross your mind, too.

Sincerely,

The Girl Who Liked You A Lot

Photo Courtesy: We Heart It